Inexpensive Ways to Woo Your Wife…By Clever Dudette
Hello again from Clever Dudette. This time I figured I’d write towards the “Marriage and Life” section of this site, but with a financial twist.
So, all you frugal men out there probably think that it’s better to be frugal than to spend money to woo your wife, or that you have to go to extravagant measures to make her happy. Now, granted, the MINI Cooper is an awesome gift and I still smile when I see it…..But let’s not talk about that right now….(although i appreciate it very much). Let’s talk about inexpensive ways to kiss up to your honey.
Here’s a list of simple things you can do to romance your wife without spending a fortune (from a woman’s perspective):
1. 
Keep fresh flowers on the table. Mike always has flowers for me, and they don’t cost a fortune. The bunch of flowers from your local grocery store works well. Mike might spend ~$4-10 every 3 weeks to keep me smiling…and although he might not think I always appreciate it, I often stare at the flowers while I’m eating breakfast in the morning and smile at the flowers he has chosen….
2. Give her cards. Buy her cards on those special days: her birthday, your anniversary, your kid’s birthdays (to say thanks)….and even those unscheduled days like a big presentation/business meeting, etc. You could buy blank cards at the store (in bulk) or the $0.99 cards at Hallmark….OR if you want to be even more inexpensive, send her e-cards online. They say that the way to a woman’s heart is to make her laugh so send her some funny ecards to make her smile. What’s important is what you say in the card.
3. Send her messages. Text her on her cell phone to let her know you’re thinking of her. Or, if she has a pager, page her. Send her emails to say “Hi!”. These are so inexpensive–about 0-25 cents per message, depending on the carrier.
4. If she’s not a card or flower person, find that little thing that she likes and do that for her. Find that little thing that you can do to make her feel special and know that you still appreciate her. Remember, you don’t have to give her something expensive to show that you care about her…..if she likes jewelry, she may laugh if you get her those $0.50 fun toys at the end of the grocery store. Who knows…Be creative and patient and know that she really does appreciate those little things you do.
However, avoid too many little things because they can get overwhelming, invasive or she could actually start taking them for granted.
Keep it spontaneous and different!
For more on this topic check out saving advice’s article on 101 Inexpensive Dates That Aren’t Cheap.
I agree it’s gestures that mean the most. I love getting a foot massage. 10 minutes and no money, but what a great feeling. I usually return the favor by giving a back massage.
My husband and I rarely give each other traditional gifts. He shows me he cares in the little things, like offering to help me with the chores if I’m running behind or rubbing my back to help me fall asleep. If I notice there is dark chocolate on sale I’ll get him a small square and pack it with his lunch without telling him. Little surprises like that mean the most (and cost the least).
Flowers and chocolates on random days can make any wife feel lighter on their feet.
Totally agree – the card thing is something I had read trouble with. I hate cards and think the card companies rip people off, but for some reason my wife responds very well to cards so I suck it up and give them to her. It is the least I can do for having to put up with me…
If you can find a few flowering things that grow well in your part of the world (look for native plants), you can plant them and the get flowers free from your yard.
Also, you can make cards. You don’t have to go all wack-o like those people who like to make scrapbooks. Just draw a silly picture (with labels, if necessary) and write a greeting inside. For example, to thank her for coming to the opera with you, you could draw two stick people sitting, label one as you and the other as her, then show them looking at another stick person and label that as the opera. Then inside say “Thanks for coming with me! Love, [you]” Easy, fun, and you don’t have to know how to draw.
Debbie, you have a good point about hand-drawn cards. It takes effort to be creative (for many people), but it’s much faster to fold a sheet of paper in half and draw something with pen, pencil, crayon or markers than to drive to the store and buy a card.
But don’t you think SHE would be thanking ME for going to the opera with HER? 🙂 I’ve been blessed that neither Stacie nor I are big on artsy stuff like opera and ballet. I don’t mind a musical once a year, but we’re very compatible in that sense.
Hey, I was just trying to think of something that lots of people don’t like but might get dragged to.
Great post. With today’s busy lifestyles, it’s easy to forget about the little things that can mean so much. Thanks for the little reminder, time to buy my wife a little surprise. 🙂
Husbands, listen up. Mine never would do anything like any of these suggestions. For over 15 years I asked both indirectly and directly for ANYTHING like this and was always rebuffed.
And now he’s my exhusband.
Sweet ways, you have a better chance by doing stuff that she likes…little things make a huge difference…
I guess I must have the ultimate husband. He is always calling me or leaving me messages, I especially get a tickle when he does the deep breating on my voicemail (of course caller ID works well here to.He also gives me a card on occassion but not a little one it’s usually one of those giant poster cards or one of those other little somethings. One of the best things is “he” does the laundry and he does it correctly. (No over drying the delicates). Me on the other hand needs more practice. Great articles.
excellent ideas. We usually do the message thing and best of all it ends with me getting a happy ending.
Why does it always fall on the husbands to spice up a marriage. The wives seem to complain more about no excitment in the marriage, but they seem to expect the husband to be the one to do something about it.
Husband: It falls on husbands to “spice up the marriage” because otherwise, we couldn’t care less about romance.
Honestly, regarding little romantic things, Stacie does much more for me than I do for her. She brings me little Butterfinger treats, brownies, cookies, cake….wait, there’s a pattern there! Anyway, I get her flowers, and even then I get lazy (actually, I just don’t go to the store as often anymore).
Generally I’ve found women are less secure about the relationship than men are, so those little things to show you’re still interested and think of her are very important to her, even if they aren’t to you.
Oh, and don’t let the “She’s not doing anything for me, so I won’t do anything for her” mentality be your excuse for being lazy in the relationship. Relationships are 100/100, not 50/50. Put your best effort forth, and she’ll appreciate it (once she recognizes that you’re being sincere!).
I always do special little things for my wife. I’ll make a handmade card and send it, leave little “Love notes” in the microwave, send emails, leave voice mails, give her back rubs, put the kids to bed so she can rest, make dinner, take her out to dinner, I always tell her how beautiful she is, I even took out a full page ad in the local newspaper to tell her how much I love her.
What do I get? Nothing. No thank you, no reciprocation, she doesn’t even reply to my emails very often – says she has no time (yet, I know she emails her friends [males] all day long).
In fact she got so mad at me for the newspaper ad, she wouldn’t talk to me for nearly two weeks. Our friends still bring it up and say it was the most romantic thing they ever seen – go figure.
Last year for Valentines I spent over a month getting all the kids (ages 4 to 19) to go to the local scrapbook store to each create a scrapbook page for her. I put these all in a nice scrapbook and we gave it to her for Valentines Day. She thanked each child and told them how much she liked it but said nothing to me. In fact, I didn’t even get a card. She said she didn’t have time.
I don’t know what else to do. I always try to come up with unique ways to “Woo” her and relight the fire (been married 8 years). A lot of the things I do get her friends “teary eyed” but seem to have no effect on her.
Any suggestions???
NothingWorks, I honestly think you two need a marriage counselor. It doesn’t sound like a normal relationship. I’m not going to judge without both sides of the story, but something is going on that is preventing her from showing the type of emotions that you’re looking for.
I forwarded the comment over to Stacie, but I think she would say the same thing. Good luck and we’ll pray for you both!
this is something i should send to my husband. he needs to learn to treat me to nifty things.
Okay, listen up, if you really want to know how to please your wife and in turn have her please you…speak her love language. Read The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman, my wife’s love languages are physical touch (YES!!!) and gifts. This book is a Godsend and it will help any marriage because once you speak his/her language, they will respond positively! Hint: Your love language is what you do the most for your spouse, because that is what makes YOU feel loved. So watch what she does for you, and even if it doesn’t make you feel love…you now know her love language! Hope this helps. Great ideas by the way…it’s my wife’s birthday! Thanks
Everyone (both husband and wife) needs to stop expecting love and and just give it. If you both sit back and wait for it to happen then it never will. If you show your partner love (not just sexually) then they should love you back. It sometimes take mutiple times for you partner to realize that you do love them but it does eventually work. Moral of the story-“all anybody wants is to know that they are loved and wated.”