While visiting my parents for Father’s Day, my mom stated to both my brother and I that we would likely be seeing each other later in September. When asked why, she told us we would be getting an invitation to Linda’s (name changed) wedding in the near future.
Turns out Linda is the youngest daughter of a cousin of ours. This cousin was our babysitter when we were kids, but I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen her. My brother and I looked at each other knowing neither of us would be traveling across the state to attend the wedding of a young woman we’ve never even met.
I know exactly why we were invited, and celebrating the nuptials of a close friend or family member has nothing to do with it. The aunts and uncles in our family keep track of who was invited to the last wedding, and sends out what I like to call â€œobligation invitationsâ€ in return. My mother likely invited someone to our wedding almost 20 years ago, and this invitation is being sent in return.
Image courtesy of xtremelife / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Weddings are a huge financial undertaking. While I certainly appreciate the invitation, I don’t know why anyone would want to pay for my family of four to eat an expensive wedding meal when I don’t know the bride or groom. Similarly, why would I spend money for gas, hotel room, food and a wedding gift to celebrate two people starting their lives together that I don’t even know.
I’m happy for my cousin’s daughter and her future husband, but if we were to attend, it would probably be the only time we’d ever see each other. Weddings are a joyous occasion where newlyweds should be surrounded by the people close to them in life, celebrating and supporting them as they transition into the next phase of their lives. If I were to attend, I would feel completely out of place.
There’s a rule of thumb that I apply whenever I decide whether to attend a wedding. I ask myself one simple question, â€œWill the bride or groom wonder why I didn’t show up?â€ In this case, the answer is a resounding, “No.”Â Thus, I will respectfully decline the invitation and save us both a little money.
Have you ever been invited to a wedding for someone you didn’t know? Did you go?
Brought to you courtesy of Brock
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