7 Reasons He’s Staying Out Late With His Friends and How to Get Him To Come Home

March 20, 2025

I overheard one of my wife’s conversations with a friend recently. Her friend was talking about how her boyfriend has been staying out late with his friends on a regular basis. It’s been getting under her skin, making her feel like she doesn’t matter to him. Occasional nights out are one thing, but if your man is staying out several nights a week, it could mean something’s amiss. Here are some reasons he might be staying out late and what you, as a partner, can do to get him to come home.

1. He Feels Stressed and Needs an Escape

Work, finances, and life responsibilities can weigh heavily on a man’s mind, and sometimes a night out feels like the perfect escape. He may not want to bring that stress home, fearing it will dampen the mood. Additionally, if he feels like home adds to his stress rather than relieving it, he might be tempted to stay out. Instead of confronting him with frustration, try creating a relaxing environment at home. A welcoming, stress-free space can make coming home more appealing.

2. He’s Seeking Adventure and Excitement

Some men crave excitement and spontaneity, which a night out with friends often provides. If he feels like his daily routine has become predictable, he may look for thrills elsewhere. Social outings can offer new experiences, laughter, and a sense of freedom. Try to keep things exciting by planning spontaneous date nights or activities that break the monotony. When home life feels just as fun as a night out, he’ll be more eager to stay in.

3. He’s Caught Up in Peer Pressure

Men, just like women, can fall into the trap of peer pressure. If his friends encourage him to stay out late, he may feel obligated to go along with the group. Some social circles emphasize partying or late-night hangouts as a measure of loyalty. Have an honest conversation about how this affects you without making him feel controlled. Encouraging balance can help him stand his ground without feeling like he’s losing his friendships.

4. He Feels Disconnected in the Relationship

If a man starts feeling emotionally or physically disconnected from his partner, he may seek companionship elsewhere. Staying out late could be his way of avoiding an underlying issue he doesn’t know how to address. Rather than assuming the worst, talk to him about how he’s feeling in the relationship. Making time for meaningful conversations and reconnecting can make home feel like the place he wants to be.

5. He Enjoys His Independence

Some men simply value their personal freedom and don’t want to feel restricted. If he feels like his independence is being threatened, he may rebel by staying out later. Respecting his need for space while setting reasonable boundaries can create a healthy balance. Let him know you trust him, and he’ll likely be more considerate about his late nights.

6. He’s Unaware of How It Affects You

Sometimes, men don’t realize how much their actions impact their partners. He might assume that staying out late isn’t a big deal because you haven’t expressed your feelings directly. Don’t wait for resentment to build. Sit down and calmly express how his behavior makes you feel. Let him know you miss spending time with him and suggest alternative ways he can balance his social life and home life.

7. He’s Simply Having Too Much Fun

Sometimes, there’s no deep reason. He may be genuinely enjoying himself. If he loses track of time, it may not mean anything more than that he’s having fun. Rather than demanding he cut his nights short, suggest setting a reasonable time for him to come home. You might also consider having something fun to do together at home. When he knows he has something enjoyable waiting for him, he may start heading home sooner.

How to Make Home His Favorite Place to Be

It’s important to maintain open communication in your relationship. Take the time to understand why he’s going out (and staying out too late). An open, honest conversation will go a lot further than arguing about his behavior. Let him know how it impacts you and look for ways to have more fun at home. In the end, your relationship should be built on mutual respect and understanding. Remember that when you approach difficult subjects like this.

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Drew Blankenship

Drew Blankenship is a former Porsche technician who writes and develops content full-time. He lives in North Carolina, where he enjoys spending time with his wife and two children. While Drew no longer gets his hands dirty modifying Porsches, he still loves motorsport and avidly watches Formula 1.